


Well heaven knows

by sweetladyygerard



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-31
Updated: 2013-01-31
Packaged: 2017-11-27 15:04:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/663380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetladyygerard/pseuds/sweetladyygerard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eighteen year old Frank loses his best friend only a day ago before he was saved by Gerard from trying to ultimately kill himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Finally updated! Enjoy! :)

The sky was a dark blue matching the empty sidewalks surrounding and the faded yellow, and white streetlights that barely given off any source of light upon the ground. It was another night walking home late from school, but this very night, I was alone. Casey decided to stay after to study her scrip for the part in, Romeo and Juliet. I honestly was not interested those things like she was, but we were fairly close--that is because I didn't have a lot of friends, especially around Belleview, New Jersey. Casey and I met a couple of years ago after my parents split, and I was left to live with just my mom. My parents were aiming for divorce for a while, after almost twenty years of marriage gone done the drain and I felt like I was poured down the drain along with it because I began to be treated like a worthless piece of shit. I mean, I understood that things were meant to change after parents split, of course I was ready for that transition, but I wasn't prepared to be treated like trash by both of my parents. It has always been complicated and I never questioned my mother of why have I been getting this unfair treatment. And until this very day, I refuse to ask.

Anyways, Casey was the greatest friend in the world.

I had been walking home for about an hour now as I had noticed that the sky grew a darker shade of blue, almost black and the cool wind began to pick up. I exhaled heavily, shoving both of my hands into my grey hoodie pockets and then, my cell phone began vibrating there. I pulled the phone out--cold to the touch and placed the phone against my face. I was too late by the time I answered and hung up. It was my mother. Whatever, I thought to myself as I reached towards my house and dug in my pocket for the house key. When I opened the door, my mother was sitting in the middle of the floor, between our small living room and the dinning area, sobbing. Instantly I had dropped my school bag and rushed over towards her with open arms--even though it was totally awkward for me. She had her hands pressed up against her soft cheeks and her head resting on her knees. I looked at her for a bit, gathering my thoughts of why was she crying and I had assumed that it was my dad. Besides my parents always made each other cry.

"Frank, sweetheart." My mother began; her words were broken as she spoke. "I have some news for you and it's very...very bad. It's about Casey."

"...Cass? What happened? Is she okay? What the hell, mom?!" I panicked.

My mother shook her head and then looked up at me. "Casey is dead. She was driving home, she was at a stop sign when a car came speeding down the road and hit her." She explained.

I just stared at her, slowly backing away from her as I did and then I rushed upstairs to my room. I couldn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it either, but it was true. Casey was dead. I finally accepted the truth after her not coming to school the next day and the announcement of her death spread all over the school. It made me sick, so sick that I decided to skip school and walk around the city. I needed to get away and be alone for a while.

I went to this abandoned house nearby my dad's house and sat on the front steps to think. I've always went there to clear my head, even during the time my parents were getting a divorce, but it has been a while since I was at the old house--which everyone called, The house that kills. (I find it completely ridiculous, right? How dumb can everyone be?)

It was small with paint chipping off the exterior and had pieces of wood in front of the windows, and door. It didn't seem scary at all and if it was I still wouldn't have thought it was scary. I tossed my school bag in the dirt and sat on the front steps. Then I noticed a man across the street, taking out his garbage with a disgusted look upon his face. He wore a pair of black dress pants and a sweater vest. His hair was coursed back and had dark mysterious eyes. I have never seen him before and I started to wonder why. Did he just move here?

I felt creepy staring honestly, but I couldn't help it. The mysterious man with the displeasing expression appeared to be gorgeous, drop dead...gorgeous. He seemed interesting, but lonely. I watched him throw a large plastic bag into the trash can that sat in the front of his house and then wiped his hands together. "Good day." The man answered, realizing that I have been staring at him for the passed minute. I could feel my cheeks turning bright red as I waved back in embarrassment. The man smiled and raised his eyebrow at me. "Is there something wrong? You look sick."

"I'm alright. Thank y-you."

"Can I ask of why are you sitting over there?"

I just shook my head. "Um, I'm just..."

"Are you new around here?" He asked.

"No." I told him. "My dad lives a few blocks from here."

The man nodded and turned away. "You should probably get home to your dad's and away from that house, it doesn't look safe." He suggested before walking inside of his house, never returning outside. Then I grabbed my bag and went on for a walk instead, avoiding the cops from being called. I honestly didn’t feel like going to my dad’s because hell, he’d probably try taking me back to school regardless of how ill I was, and so I decided to walk through the woods which is literally farther down from dad’s house. It was something new I haven’t done in a while; going off into the woods and retrace my thoughts. The last time I went off into woods was a few years ago on my sixteenth birthday. My parents threw a party there and of course since it being Halloween, everyone who was invited had to wear costumes. Anyways, these kids from my school were there and we all decided to mess around the vague darkness. It was getting really cold too; I could barely feel my hands, but I didn’t care. So as we were playing, someone set a fire and threw it over by this old house that led you out the end of the woods. It was pretty bad actually because someone caught us. My parents weren’t too upset with me since I didn’t start the fire, but I was grounded for a month. I told myself I’d never do that again, well, be apart of something so stupid like that and for those kids from my birthday party; they spend the night in jail. (Luckily no one got hurt from the fire or they would have been toast)  
   
The woods were no longer dark when I got there and one seemed to be around to even see me, so I walked through it anyways. I don’t remember how long I had been walking, but eventually I stopped at the old house that was set on fire a few years ago. Every single piece of the burned house reminded me of everything that happened that day. It started to make me feel bad, even worse than before but I couldn’t help not to look. I walked up towards it a bit more for a closer view, when suddenly tugs on my shoe. Instantly I began to panic as I reached for my shoe, which was stuck in a ditch. I couldn’t pull it out just by my yanking, so I slid my foot out of my shoe and fled away from the house. Then the next thing I knew was that I fell backwards and I hit my head onto something really hard. I could no longer move either, my eyes grew heavy and everything was a blur; then complete darkness.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know why, but I wrote this listening to Burn Bright on repeat OuO Go figure! 
> 
> Enjoy ;)

When I woke up the first thing I saw was a man that I had found to be familiar with. It was the same man that lived across from the abandoned house. I stared at him dazily and gently touched his cheek. I had no real clue what the hell had gotten into me, but my head was spinning mad—great, nice excuse right? The man did not care though, in fact he let me touch him and restlessly caress his cheek. His face was soft and perfect like an angel’s bottom. Then around the corner of his mouth was a crest, perhaps it was a healed scar that never went away and the man carefully took my hand, where my fingertips lightly brushed his lips. We locked eyes for a moment before I could speak, struggling all that I wanted to ask and the man answered, "Frank, you're alright. You had me frightened for a moment." 

"Who are you? How..uh, how the hell do you know my name?" I asked as I squinted my eyes shut. "Where am I?"

"You're safe now. I found you in the woods when I was going for my walk, which I hope you don't mind me asking why were you there? I thought I told you to go home." The man rambled. I looked up at him and shook my head. The man sighed and coursed his hair back with his hand. There was something strange about his hand though. It was not his perfect pale fleshed color, like the rest of his being but it was pinksh looking from his wrist to his knuckles. I couldn't help but to stare and wonder, which was quite rude of me. It was probably rude to begin with that he found me and let me rest in his home. I didn't really expect for anyone to have found me anyhow, but for the man, I thank him. "Your father called you by the way, Frank. He's been trying to reach you for a few hours now. Perhaps you call him back and let him know where you are." The man insisted. 

"Nothing. God, my dad will live. Thanks." I replied. "Excuse me, but you never told me who the fuck you were and how do you know my name?" 

The man's eyes widen in fear of my spating and reached over to my pocket, where my wallet was missing. "Your wallet must've fell when you hurt yourself. Your ID indicates that you are Frank Anthony Iero, now am I correct or do I have to report this wallet stolen?" 

"I'm Frank, yes. Jesus, uh, who are you? Please?" 

The gorgeous man cleared his throat before he spoke, "I'm Gerard. Gerard Way. It's nice to meet you, Frank. I saved your fucking life. You're welcome." He said before moving away from me, allowing me to sit up and acknowlege my whereabouts. I was lounging in Gerard's small living room. There were three little tan sofas that matched the black carpet and white sheer curtains. The house smelled sweet like vanilla and the soft sound of something cooking in the kitchen was sizzling calmly, awaiting for Gerard to check on it. I pulled myself up a bit from the sofa and rubbed my eyes. Then Gerard came back into the living room with a glass of water and sat next to me. "Are you hungry? I'm making tacos. I mean that is if you're staying." He offered. 

I shook my head. "I'm not hungry. Thank you." 

"No problem." He smiled. "May I ask you something, Frank? It's alright if you don't." 

"Sure. I guess." 

Gerard grabbed my wrist and pulled up my sleeve, exposing old scars down my arms. I will admit it. I used to cut myself and see that's the thing...I used to. I stopped because I felt it wasn't doing shit for me anyways. It would only piss me off either because I had no sharp objects or Casey would stop me. But now that she's gone, why not start again. Right? I felt embarrassed once Gerard took my arm and glanced at all those scars I had left there. He seemed terrifide as he stared, lightly touching the scars with his disoriented hand and then placed his hand over them. "What were you thinking?" 

"You don't know me." I swallowed. "Don't worry about it."

"Well of course I do. Now I do and I just was being curious about these cuts up your arms. Frank, why are you cutting yourself?" 

I hesitated. "I fell, Gerard. People fall all the time." I was lying to myself. The worse part about it was that Gerard knew that I was lying to him. He lightly brushed my arm with his hand again and took my hand. I felt like crying, fuck, I wanted to cry so fucking bad. I hate myself. God, I hate myself so much. I had to confess to him, even though we just met. "I don't want to live. Does that give you a better reason of why, Gerard?"

Gerard looked up at me and released my hand from his. "You're better than this. Whatever is going on in your life, don't you ever hurt yourself because you know what?"

"What?" I sighed, trying to avoid myself from crying in front of him. 

"You're beautiful. I can tell that you're upset about something and you feel lost. Well guess what Frank? You're not alone." He explained. I didn't know what else to say. After all I had never been called beautiful. I mean I always had Casey to encourage me, but now I think about it. She never said I was beautiful. That very moment, I knew I couldn't cut myself for good. Gerard was so kind to say those things to me and I was kinda an asshole to him. I wasn't sure if he really meant it though, but it felt nice. "I know that I don't know you well, but I do know that this, Frank, is not worth it."

"Gerard, I lost my best friend." I told him. "She died in an accident last night."

He nodded and rubbed my wrist. "I'm sorry to hear about that, Frank. How about you come over tomorrow after school or whatever you do, I'd like to show you something." He suggested, removing his hand from my wrist. 

I honestly didn't care anymore that I just met him. I needed someone anyways. Anyone but my parents. "Okay." I agreed. "I'll come over after school."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Gerard's POV; then Frank's POV***  
> Gerard is 24, just so you know and ehem...
> 
> ((Have a bucket to sob while reading))

Before Frank left he looked back at me with worry in his eyes. I felt bad, maybe I scared him and he probably won't come back. I don't mind it though because I'm used to being alone. However finding Frank in the woods had scared me and I'm glad that I had taken it upon myself to help him. He needed some help, I figured and so I did. The house was quiet and it became my solitude again, where I would usually sit inside and stare out the window. I think about my life and what the hell should I do about it. I mean I went to art school but it wasn't enough. I wanted to do something more and I still do. But the only thing that's holding me back is my right hand. It's disturbing looking and a bit weak after being burned last year. It was the end of summer and my boyfriend at the time, Bert were almost ready to split but I wouldn't let that happen. Well one day, we were argueing while I was baking cookies to take to my parents and Bert was talking about how we were never going to work out, so maybe he should just leave me. It broke my heart because I didn't have anyone else and I didn't want him to leave me, so I begged him to stay. Then one thing led to another, things got a bit physical and he had me by the hair. I don't remember every detail but somehow, I fell and smacked my hand against the extremely hot oven door, where Bert grabbed me and shoved me against it. Then he slapped me across the face. It sounds like he wanted to hurt me, right? Well it turned out that he was cheating on me with a girl and he never really loved me. I was sad about that and I forgave him for hurting me like he did. I didn't want him to think I hated him too because I didn't. I still loved him. Mikey thought it was pathetic of me to say that, but I was being completely honest. Maybe Mikey is right though. I was pathetic. I think about it all the time now, remembering that night my life changed and how it could've been handled differently because now my hand still aches sometimes. It makes me feel ugly sometimes as well and there's nothing I can do about it. When I look at myself in the mirror every morning, I try to smile and hope for a good day. I still continue to do so and try to think of happy shit. It works somedays and so, I'd go out for a walk. Like today I went for a walk and I ran into Frank.

I think Frank is gorgeous. I mean, I don't want to sound desperate but he is and he seemed to have lost himself too. I want to help him so he doesn't end up hating life as much as I used to when Bert left me with ugly scars. Frank is way too beautiful to hate. I don't know what it was though when Frank had opened his eyes and stared at me. It was like staring into eyes of an angel. It's been a while since I felt that kind of way towards someone and I'm a bit afraid of it. What if he runs off and never wants to talk to me again? I don't want that. I don't even have any friends. After Bert and I stopped speaking, everyone kind of started to walk away from me. It was either because they thought it was my fault that Bert had left me, and I was sleeping around or I was too stupid for forgiving him. I just want someone to be there for me. I'm so alone and I'm just glad that I ran into Frank. Maybe we could be friends...I hope.

\---

Once I gotten home, both of my parents were sitting in the living room worried about me. I flashed them a pretty convincing smile so they could just fuck off my case, but it didn't work out so well after all. "Frank Iero, where have you been? We've been loving all over for you." Dad spoke, sternly. "You weren't in school today."

"Well yeah," I replied in a smart-ass kind of way. Oh well, my dad didn't give a shit anyways so whatever. "I went for a walk in the woods. It's not a big deal."

"Are you alright?" Mom asked. 

"He's standing in front of us, isn't he?" Dad spat. "Therefore he's fine. So what the hell were you doing in the woods?" 

I sighed heavily and said, "Thinking."

"Thinking about what?" 

I shook my head as the thoughts of losing Casey played in my head again, and then for some reason...Gerard. I don't know why I was thinking about him, but I was. Just remembering Gerard touching my arm when he noticed my scars and how he asked to see me tomorrow. Honestly I'm kind of excited to see him. "I was thinking about Casey. I'm going to miss her." 

Dad nodded. "I'm sorry. But before taking off places, you need to call me or your mother. You got it, Frank?"

"Yeah. Sure. Well um, I'm gonna go upstairs and change. I have to finish my coursework that's due tomorrow." I explained.

"Alright then, Frank." Mom said. "Good."

It seemed like my parents cares, right? I'm just being over dramatic. Well no, my parents were only this way because I lost my best friend. Their playing nice game only sickened me to the stomach. I hate it so much. Why can't they be honest and sweet like every other perfect family? Ugh, I hate my life sometimes. I rushed upstairs into my room and laid across my bed of my small warm room, my walls covered with posters of the Misfits, Black Flag, and many more. My floor was no longer visble by the piles of clothes on the floor and Halloween costumes I have from over the years. I never cleaned my room. It probably smelled bad according to my mother, but I never cared. I began staring up at the ceiling where I started thinking about Gerard again. He was smiling and being his beautiful fucking self, for hours until I found myself falling asleep. 

I dreamt about Gerard in the most awkward, sexual way ever. It's rare that I had sexual dreams like the one I was having. Oh God, it was fucking strange though. Usually if I did have a well, wet dream, it's me getting a blowjob or something causal like that, but this one about Gerard was different. He was laying under me while I fucked him in the ass, over his coffee table in the living room. He was so into it and so was I, and he continued to beg for me to fuck him harder. I felt kind of dirty for thinking of him like that and besides, it was absolutely the worse timing to want to touch myself. But hell once I woke up, I had the biggest boner in the history of me actually getting a boner and I was just so fucked. I needed to rub one off and think about something totally different, but it was unfortunate. Gerard played in the back of my head again as I reached into my pants and shut my eyes closed. Gerard was on his knees this time, sucking me off and it felt so fucking good. I just wanted to cry it was so perfect. Then once I had came, I couldn't help but whimper as cum gotten all over my t-shirt and fist. I cleaned myself up after I took a moment to breathe and rolled back in bed. I skipped dinner. I was too fucked and tired to eat.


	4. Chapter 4

The next morning I ended up waking up late for school and my mom had left a few hours earlier to do the grocery shopping. I honestly didn’t feel like getting up out of bed nor in the mood to watch the entire student body mourn over Casey. However I decided to go to school anyways, besides, mom would’ve been all over my case. Once I arrived super late, everyone had been waiting out in the hallways with flowers in hand. I knew exactly what was going on. I knew that everyone would be standing at Casey’s old locker, sobbing madly as if they lost their best friend and even the popular kids were crying. Well Casey was pretty popular but she always spoke to me and never treated me any different. She was the sweetest person anyone would’ve known and perfect. I stood there in the mist of it all, the floor soaked with tears, candles and a few stuffed animals. Casey’s locker was decorated beautifully I will admit and I was very impressed by how well the school had arranged her flowers, which were in the form of hearts. I could only shed a tear and shook my head in disbelief of Casey’s absence again. Fuck! I thought to myself before storming out of the school and headed straight to Gerard’s house. Going to school was the worse idea I ever had.  
Gerard had been sitting on his porch having himself a smoke before he noticed me sobbing. He didn’t even hesitate to run up to me and wrap his arms around me. I barely knew him, may I remind you and he smelled like vanilla. It actually helped me from crying because of how sweet Gerard smelled.

My face was still buried in Gerard's chest when I wiped my face, allowing one last tear to fall freely. Gerard rubbed my back and shushed me. It made me smile. I needed to smile anyways. "Is that vanilla lotion you're wearing?" I asked him quietly. 

"I was baking cookies and I spilled some vanilla extract on myself. It smells nice right? That's why I haven't changed my shirt yet." Gerard explained himself as he smiled back at me. "However you seem pretty upset too and I get it. I really do, Frank and I'm sorry."

"Thank you, Gerard." I nodded and wiped my face again. 

"Uh, please call me Gee. Everyone calls me Gee." 

Gee, huh? That's fucking adorable. I thought to myself as I bit my lip, avoiding myself from laughing. "Well alright, Gee. Uh...can I come in?" I asked, motioning to the door. 

"Oh yeah. Yes, uh-huh of course you can come in. Join me for coffee and bagels, Frank. " He smiled cheerfully. He seemed excited to have me back over which was warming but for some strange reason I noticed him blushing. I honestly thought it was cute of him; however, it was nothing really. I mean besides the weird ass dream--excuse me, a fucking wet dream over him last night. I don't think it was normal, but hell I was never normal and neither is my own fucked up family. So be it then that I'm pretty much gay. 

Gerard walked me through his little apartment, stopping by a room full of art supplies and a couple of easels here, and there. I also spotted a few piles of old comic books and tons of literature books. I figured he was super smart and probably a comic book freak. I could feel myself becoming more attractive to him. "You've read every book in here?" I asked jokingly. 

"Actually I haven't but I plan on it. That's my goal." He said with pride in his voice, then stared at me shyly. "I'm not cool, okay? I get it." 

"No, no, you're cool Gee. I think you're pretty cool...and everything." 

Gerard nodded. "Okay, well, come along in the kitchen and have yourself a bagel. I have a feeling that you haven't eaten yet, now am I correct?"

"Uh, I'll just--"

"Frank, you're hungry. I'm going to feed you, okay? Now follow me." He giggled, gently taking my arm into his scarred hand and took me into his kitchen. "I just made a pot of coffee and there's creamer in the fridge if you want any. Please make yourself at home." 

"Okay then." I murmured, pulling myself seat as I watched him pase back and forth. He pulled out two ceramic coffee mugs and carefully poured the steaming hot coffee from off the counter, into the mugs. Then he turned to me with a bit of sadness across his face. I felt bad. 

"I'm sorry if I'm freaking you out, Frank. I literally almost never have company over and I thought it was nice that you came back to see me. You didn't get intimidated by me or my scars, I mean...I'm being personal but I'm sorry, Frank. Please forgive me." He rambled. "I do have something to show you however and I think it will help you feel better." 

It made me feel kind of sad inside in a way. Like how can anyone not visit him? "No one comes to see you" I inquired. Gerard shook his head and smiled. 

"Well it's a part of life, Frank. We lose friends and family members but we don't forget who we are." He said eloquently. "That's why I wanted to talk to you about; life and loss."


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Late update!  
> I'm super busy so this chapter might suck, sorry XP 
> 
> I might re-write everything later to make it better
> 
> Anyhow, enjoy!

"Well that's easy, life sucks." I told him as he put two bagels in the toaster. "Then we die." 

With his back facing me, I could hear him exhale heavily and his head lowered. "It is true, unfortunately but life can be a good thing too." He said gently, now turning towards me again. "Have you ever been somewhere that made you feel free or maybe you've seen something that you felt connected to?" 

"Sure." I nodded.

"Well sometimes that can change your perspective on life, Frank. You will see." He smiled. "Like for example, when I was in art school I was able to go to places like Spain and it was really fun. I mean, there's a bit of a language barrier but I love it there."

"You've been to Spain?" 

"Yeah, it's great. I had done some paintings years ago and I sent them there. People actually liked it but then I lost the ability to continue to paint."  He explained. "The feeling in my fingers are gone and I can't do much with my hand because it hurts too much, so I just imagine myself painting again instead. I guess my point is that painting makes me feel free and thinking about it makes me happy, even though I can't paint anymore." 

"Doesn't that make you sad sometimes, Gee?" I asked as he took the toasted bagels out of the toaster. "I mean thinking about painting." 

"No, not at all." Gerard shook his head. "It's just the idea that makes me happy. But tell me, Frank, is there anything that makes you happy?"

"Casey used to make me happy, considering she was my only friend." 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super late update! Sorry, thanks for being patient and have Merry little Christmas :3

Gerard nodded his head, seemingly genuine about my happiness and he didn't even really fucking know me. Here I am opening up to this stranger--I mean, this kind gentle human being with no friends or family surrounding him. I usually would've backed off and realized how weird this actually is but I didn't. I had no one to really turn to, I mean no at this point. 

Gerard asked after a few moments of silence, "What was she like?" 

"The most popular girl in school, the theater kid; everyone wanted to be around her. She even talked to the outcasts in the school in which I thought that there was something wrong with her. Why in the hell would you want to spend your valuable time on kids like them and me," I explained as I began twirling my thumbs. Gerard remained silent as I continued, "as if I'm some fucking charity case, you know? But I was wrong about her. Casey was just being a good person that she always strived to be." 

"She seemed wonderful, Frank." He spoke softly before a loud thud occurred behind him followed by the sweet aroma of freshly toasted bagels. It made my stomach turn angrily, reminding to never leave the house without eating again, silently cursing myself as I watched Gerard pour himself more coffee in the process. "And you know Frank," he cleared his throat and sniffled, "I know what you mean about feeling like a fucking charity case too." 

"Really?" 

"Yeah, I really do." He sat two plates on the table with the bagels and pulled himself a chair across from me. This time I had gotten a closer, much better look at Gerard besides his fingers and the way his lips moved when he spoke. He had freckles and a cute little nose that I had found to be absolutely adorable. Gerard also smelled even better conflated with the vanilla that he spilled on himself. I almost wanted to lay my head against his chest again. I don't know why but I just found it so hard to resist. 

"Well what happened?" I had asked. 

Gerard took a sip of his coffee and swallowed shallowly. "When people look at me, they feel bad for me, especially when I was in a accident. I was just this porcelain doll that everyone wanted to save and they just feel bad because of how pathetic I have felt about myself." He explained. "My family were the ones that pushed me away and my ex-fiancé went to jail because of me, so yeah...I get it, Frank."

"Wait, your fiancé?" I shook my head confusedly. 

"Yes, I was getting married. We were together for a long time--met each other because of our parents. It's nothing really."

"You would've made a great husband." I noted, lowering my head at the table.

"Aww thanks," he chuckled lightly, tapping his fingertips against his coffee mug, "I would've but he didn't love me." 

He, I thought to myself, did he just say 'he' or am I going nuts? Gerard cleared his throat again, taking another sip of his coffee. I carefully looked up at him and began nibbling a piece of my toasted bagel, my stomach feeling much better in the process. I had no idea that Gerard would've been gay. I mean him looking almost like a woman and/or mistaken to be one, it never crossed my mind for a split second. 

"How come?" I had asked, nonchalantly ignoring the fact that Gerard was not discussing about a woman not loving him. I truly didn't give two shits; however, I was caught by surprise. 

"He just--" Gerard sighed, a hint of pain and sadness in his soft spoken voice. "He just didn't love me, Frank. He wanted to be with other women so I just walked away. I mean, good for him but he hurt me." 

I didn't know what else to say. It was overwhelming. Maybe because I still can't grasp Casey being gone and that Gerard is a single loved-less person whom practically would bend over backwards for you. It just made sad and I could tell by Gerard's expression that he was in fact still hurting too. All I could do is eat silently as Gerard had done the same for a short while.

"It happens, like I said and it's okay. I'm okay." He smiled half-heartedly. "And you know what? You're going to be okay too." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if I announced this but okay, I'm in the middle of trying to wrap something up I've been wanting to publish into a legit story for about five years now and I'm just going insane. I want more time soon to write more to this on a regular basis and I think I might just re-write this too. I'm not sure yet but thanks for waiting. It means a lot. :) Until next time and I'll see you real soon


End file.
